Tuesday, May 16, 2006

Why I Advocate for Homeschooling

Ms. Chip-On-Her-Shoulder is a teacher who comes to our library weekly. Teachers are easily identifiable because they are the only ones to check out 50 books about Thomas Jefferson at one time (and see nothing wrong with that).

So Ms. Chip-On-Her-Shoulder comes into the library slashing our thick, musty air with her delightfully raised nostril. After roust-a-bouting for 20 minutes, she approaches the desk, and asks if she can buy our Orlando Bloom READ poster, "in case we ever wanted to get rid of it." In the picture he is topless and strategically holds a copy of The Lord of the Rings in front of himself, cradlingng it like a moist towel. Okay . . . he's not really topless, but that's how I'll always see him.

Yeah, sure. Let me just take it down for you. It only takes AN ACT OF CONGRESS for us to obtain a treasure like a $15 poster for our little ol' library. In fact, why pay for it at all? Just take it for free!

I explain to her that she can get her own poster, with a celebrity of her choice, on the American Library Association's website.

Pause.

"Well," she says with her nose in the air, "I don't do computers."

An elementary school teacher who "doesn't do computers"? No wonder kids would rather have Lincoln's 1980 biography than use a biography database, which the library PAYS for with MONEY.

And believe me, those databases cost a hell of a lot more than a damn Orlando Bloom poster. (And don't ever touch my Orlando Bloom, lady!)

6 Comments:

At 3:24 PM, Blogger Angel, librarian and educator said...

Heck, if my kid had teachers like her, I would be homeschooling her myself. I cannot help but wonder what else she does not do. I will stop here before I get carried away.

Best, and keep on blogging.

 
At 9:52 PM, Blogger Happy Villain said...

We, too, have the Orlando Bloom poster, and the Antonio Banderas one, which is my personal favorite. The ALA is good for something, that's for sure.

She doesn't do computers? There are just too many puns, none of which she'd find half as amusing as I do. Were teachers this bad when I was a kid? I think not. Maybe you have a point about homeschooling.

 
At 5:05 PM, Blogger Annoyed Librarian said...

That's mean to make fun of the poor stupid teacher. I bet she has an education degree and everything. We should respect her because it's all about the children.

 
At 10:11 AM, Blogger katie b said...

she best not even think about getting near orlando! she has no idea how exciting it is to get something indulgent like a poster of our choice for the library. if she only "did" computers, she could learn to have orlando bloom wallpaper on the desktop of her very own computer. but she probably doesn't deserve him anyway!

 
At 9:33 AM, Blogger mhmsmedia said...

i'm a middle school library media/ technology specialist (and yeah, i do know computers, and have a media blog... how disgusting that she did not, i'm appalled!) ... i have to say i have a great relationship with my local library...but there *ARE* teachers who bypass my collection because they plan at the LAST MINUTE. i will buy my teachers ANYthing they want if they only give me a head's up...that way they don't have to bother you guys too much...
also, i have the orlando poster (wish i had antonio..checked ebay, no go! :-( and if anyone tried to nab it, they'd be missing digits!

 
At 2:53 PM, Blogger j- said...

Of course, there are also teachers who don't "do books" either. Back in my public library days, I had a teacher visit about ten minutes before closing [8:50 p.m.] hoping to check out "Saving Private Ryan" on VHS because she was "teaching" a "World War Two" section the next day.

It's too bad there were dozens of holds on our only copy, because as we all know, there's nothing one can't learn about WWII from a movie that fictionalizes one tiny mission from one tiny front in a global war.

 

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